One of the most fundamental principles of self love is having a positive mindset...
Being PRESENT, what does that mean to you?
The majority of people spend most of their time living either in the past ("I wish I had...") or in the future ("What if..."). But the only time that is reality and matters is the present.
Ok, now that we have that out of the way... You ask me, how do I be present?
It takes a lot of practice, like anything else. You are going to re-program the way you look at the thoughts you are observing.
At any given time throughout the day when we are not engaged in analytical thought, we are in our "monkey mind". This is when we are either imagining different scenarios of a past event that happened and trying to change the outcome, or worrying about something that never happened yet and may never happen at all.
When we are in this state, it causes our fears and insecurities to grow and gain strength.
How Do You Stop It?
When I get stuck in my monkey mind, I try to notice it as quickly as possible, that is the part that takes the most practice. Becoming AWARE of the thoughts by becoming a conscious OBSERVER of the thoughts.
I stop my current thought process and ask myself "is what you are thinking about actually happening?"
If it is not:
I then focus on either my breath, or on the current situation at hand.
I try to concentrate on each of my 5 senses and what they are experiencing at the moment.
I choose the next thought and make it something I love.
I think of all of the things and people I have in my life and how grateful I am for them.