Dealing with grief, is it a choice?

Grief is a very powerful emotion. It is so strong that it rapidly affects our mental state and our body physically.

We can shift from happy to paralyzed in seconds.

This feeling can last for days, weeks, months, or in some cases like mine years.

After my children’s mother lost her battle with depression and took herself from us in 2015, I was debilitated with grief to the point that I lost my job and couldn’t eat or sleep.

But is the grief automatic or a choice?

We deal with situations that trigger us throughout our day. These triggers will cause different reactions for all of us.

A situation than can be okay for one person but present a major perceived terror to another.

To learn more effective responses to grief, it is necessary to recognize how grief affects us and what responses we choose to react with.

Being present or mindful of our thoughts and emotions can play an important role in choosing how we react to our grief.

When you begin to notice a grief response arising, ask yourself: What thoughts can I choose to think of instead of the ones that are upsetting me.

Thoughts of gratitude are the strongest to combat grief and recent studies have proven that gratitude can lessen the severity of grief and anxiety.

I like to close my eyes and take a few slow deep breaths to relieve my nervous system and get out of fight or flight response.

I also close my eyes and think of all of the things I have in my life that I am grateful for. This makes me smile.

I feel the fight or flight response subside. Once I have calmed down I choose a different thought to entertain. Once based in love and happiness.

The mind can play terrible tricks on us and convince us that our grief is permanent. That is fear, another very strong emotion.

The worst case scenario will probably will never happen the way you imagine it.

Just focus on what you need to do next.

Think about the possible outcomes and come up with a plan to get through it.

Or, like me, you can choose to only think about the positive outcome you desire.

Love & Light


© Copyright 2024 Jay Deutsch • Self Love & Mindset Coach
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The information on this website and coaching service is provided as an informational resource only, and is not to be used or relied on for any diagnostic treatment purposes or considered professional medical advice. This information is not intended to be patient education, does not create any patient-therapist relationship, and should not be used as a substitute for professional diagnosis or treatment. I waive all claims which might arise from my use of this website and release any person or entity connected with this website of any liability.
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